S2E12: Pivoting from Illness to Wellness: A Story of Setbacks and Success Ft. Bonnie Hewitt
Bonnie Hewitt, the founder of Posh Notions, an upcycling business based in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania shares her pivotal moments from being diagnosed with Guillain-Barre syndrome, among a lot of her chronic illnesses, to founding Posh Notions and winning the Two-Minute Drill contest in the US.
Bonus content next: How She Met Her (Famous) Mentors!
Bonnie: I didn't even realize that that should have been a wake up call.
The shift that I've made from how sick I am to I'm healing in a couple of years is phenomenal because unfortunately there's a lot of people that get the condition than I have, and it's completely crippled them.The
Glee: Hey Zesties! Welcome to the gleeful talk show where we share zesty stories to cultivate the happiness and hero within. I love hearing stories about overcoming adversity. It really inspires me to look beyond the gray skies and see. That there is a blue sky behind it.
Our guest today has been diagnosed by a chronic illness, which left her at temporarily paralyzed over time. She has been diagnosed with numerous chronic conditions. She was previously an accountant, but because of her circumstances, she was unable to come back to the corporate world. But instead she built a world of her own turning illness to business to greatness.
Please help me welcome Bonnie Hewitt. Hi, Bonnie. Welcome to the show.
Bonnie: Hi, I'm so happy to be here. I'm excited to get started.
Glee: Yeah. Thank you? for coming in the show. So, I've mentioned earlier that you have a business right now. It's called posh notions. And I am very curious. What was your life before having posh notions
so Can you help us understand a bit more on your life story before Posh Notions?
Bonnie: Yeah, so I started Posh Notions in 2016, so I've quite a life built up before that. So I had a semi-normal childhood, had some trauma here and there. Labeled high, strong at a very young age. And so I ended up having my first child pretty young. I was 21 when I had him.
He's 21 now. So and then I had my daughter a couple of years after that. And at that point I had been, actually been in a car accident. I actually completely forgot about this, but I was in a car accident and I was told I couldn't work. So I decided I was going to go back to school. And I got my degree in accounting.
Only because I knew I would be good at it. Not because it was like my passion or anything. But I did that. And I was done with school. They were, I think like five and three. And I worked in the field for a few years. I worked for some corporate banking and some private small accounting firms and in 2011 So my husband and I had separated and I was a single mom at the time I was raising both my kids.
They were nine and 11. And out of nowhere I got really, really sick and ended up in the hospital temporarily paralyzed, like you mentioned, with a condition called Guillain-Barre syndrome. And it was basically like having a stroke and it was what I call the first part of my healing journey. I saw, like I said, I was a single mom.
I was working from home at the time. I was an accountant. My oldest is on the autism spectrum. So I was managing all his care and really just trying to do everything by myself and not taking good care of myself, pumping a lot of caffeine. And I tell people, it was kind of like my body's shut me off, like a surge protector, because had I kept going the way I was going, I probably wouldn't know.
Gone much further, I'd lost a ton of weight. I was definitely underweight at the time and I remember coming home from the hospital and trying to go back right back to work. The next day online and realized, realized very quickly. So yeah. having this illness, like I said, it was like having a stroke, so I had to learn to walk and talk and eat and type and do all, all my gross motor skills, fine motor skills that were gone.
My reflexes were gone, so I kind of had to start from scratch and I was in the hospital for a few weeks. And when I did come home, I, all I wanted to do was get out of the hospital. So when I got home, I just tried to go right back to my life and was like, oh, and kind of like, that was a blip let's move on.
And really, that's not what ended up happening. my body couldn't hack it. my cognitive thinking. Severely impaired. I couldn't remember things. I couldn't learn new things. So working as an accountant, doing bookkeeping and, you know, taxes and stuff, it was really difficult to try to do these things because I couldn't focus.
I couldn't concentrate and I couldn't really make sense of a lot of things. So it was shortly after that maybe a month or two that I ended up actually being, let go from my job because I couldn't do what they needed me to do. And I got better. And then I hit like a plateau to where I wasn't getting any better anymore.
So that was like What I should have been kind of a wake up call and I tell people it really wasn't a wake-up call. Unfortunately, I just kept trying to go back to my old life and, you know, take care of my kids and go back to work. My husband and I have reconciled. And I just, this didn't allow it to be the teaching experience initially that maybe I should have.
So that was 2011. I had my third child in 2013, about a year and a half after getting sick. And you know, was taking care of a new baby trying to do things to bring in a little bit of money. I was trying to flip on eBay, do some reselling and whatnot.
And then in 2016, I got pregnant with my fourth child, very unexpectedly. He is our miracle baby, for sure. And. I knew that I had to try to do something cause my husband was working, but our fourth child was on the way we, financially we're pretty strapped. And I got a cutting machine for my birthday which cut various materials.
So like paper and vinyl and different things and started to make decals for my husband's the team that he was on. Just trying to see if I could bring in a little bit of money. And then later that year around Christmas time, a good friend of mine asked me if I could make a t-shirt for her son. And I was like, I don't know if I could give it a shot.
Let's see. And really that was the first time I had made a piece of apparel and that was the very beginning of learning how to make custom apparel for people. And a few months after that was when I ended up launching posh notions, making custom apparel for businesses and organizations, custom pieces for individuals.
So yeah, that's kind of how I got to launching Posh Notions.
Glee: yeah. I wanted to go back a little bit on about the the syndrome that you mentioned. So was it because you were just not taking care of yourself at that time. That's why you had that syndrome and multiple chronic illnesses that at that point in time.
Bonnie: So the Guillain-Barre was kind of like a kickoff and it's a rare syndrome. not taking care of myself, made me more susceptible to it. So people sometimes get it after like being sick with the flu or they get other things that can set it off. I think just not taking care of myself was kind of like the catalyst or allowed me to, to be susceptible to this thing.
What happened after
that was like, I was diagnosed with multiple conditions after that. So once at one point they said, I didn't have Guillain-Barre. One doctor said there was no way that I could healed that fast from something. So they decided that I didn't have it. So there was kind of back to the drawing board and the doctors were bouncing between trying to figure out what the heck was wrong with me.
Because when I came home, I was riddled with pain. I was fatigued. I was sleeping 16 hours a day. I couldn't walk up my steps. I had to crawl. I couldn't lift up a pot of water. So all my strength was gone. So they initially diagnosed me with fibromyalgia. And then after I had my third child, they told me I ended up having rheumatoid arthritis.
And it was like, once they started giving me these diagnoses, they just kind of snowballed. And it was like, well, now you have this and now you have this and now you have that. And now I have this whole list of things That are all, auto-immune conditions. And I kinda just, I don't, like I say, I ignore them, but I don't really focus too much on when they give me a new diagnosis.
Cause it's really not changing anything about how I feel. And I'm already doing all of the things that I need to do, with my diet and exercise nutrition, mindfulness, meditation, yoga, like all of these different things. So like I said, I just had two new diagnosis diagnoses last year and I was like, okay, now what?
Like, I'm just going to keep pushing forward and taking care of myself the best that I can, because really that's all I can do. The medications haven't worked for me, we could talk about that if you want. But yeah, it's been, it's been an interesting journey the past. It's been almost a decade now, so it's an interesting journey.
Glee: wow. Very, strong woman, indeed. I can't imagine, like, what was your, biggest motivation to keep on going.
Bonnie: So I think initially it was, I'd wanted to get the hell out of the hospital. Right. I just, I didn't want to be there. And then most of it centered around my kids because I'm I still am the, like the default caregiver my husband and I, like I said, reconcile, but I do like on the mom, And so it had a lot to do with, with them and being able to do things with them, being able to do things for them, but showing them not to quit, but at the same time, I have always just had a push forward mindset. I've had so many things that have happened from childhood.
And so now that it was always just kinda like, I was always onto the next thing. And now I'm actually, it's funny because I'm actually unraveling that now I've been reading a lot of books and kind of realizing that not letting myself feel things and kind of just plowing right through everything that happened.
Wasn't necessarily the, the healthiest way to do things and kind of learning healthier coping and mindset techniques to push forward, but not to have to keep relearning these same lessons over and over and over again. Cause that's, that's what ended up happening to me. A lot of the things that were happening to me were very closely related.
And it was like, I just wasn't getting it. Like I said, that first part of my healing journey should have been a wake up call. So stuff just kept smacking me in the face. Like, Hey, are you going to listen? Are you going to listen to me? It's like, no, no, no. It wasn't until 2017 that I finally kind of started to listen and say, okay, I kind of, I think I might know what's going on here.
I didn't even realize that that should have been a wake up call. And so five, six years later, like it didn't Dawn on me that like, Hey, maybe this isn't the life that you're supposed to be living. Maybe you're not supposed to be doing all those things. Maybe this is a redirect and you're supposed to be going in this direction, but you're fighting it, you know, that kind of thing.
it's been amazing. These past three to four years have been the best part of the whole thing. To be honest with you, lots of learning.
Glee: so you mentioned when you were just starting out with posh notions and, when you were sewing masks, I read that during the COVID time and you, you also had arthritis arthritis that moved your spine too.It was, really another setback with when you even just started. So how, was that experience?
Bonnie: so I'm going to start in 2017, because this was really a pivotal moment for me. So I have mental health history that precedes my physical health history. A lot of depression, anxiety, a lot of trauma. I'm not going to go into specifics started in childhood and that preceded getting sick physically getting sick I had been seeing a psychiatrist regularly.
I was on probably a dozen psych meds. And up on this one down on that one, on this one, off that one, like it just, this medication rollercoaster for years, same thing happened with when they diagnosed me with the rheumatoid arthritis, so that would have been 2013, a few months after my third child was born.
I refused medication at first because I was nursing. So I didn't take any medication for that. And so he was two years old and the same thing happened with that. I was taking this medication that made me sick. I took a different medication, had a large reaction. One of them wants to far as who I actually had a psychotic breakdown.
Like I was clinically psychotic diagnosed with psychosis from this medication and had to stop that immediately. I kept having all these experiences with medication. And finally told that doctor, my rheumatologist, like let's just stick with the prednisone and it's the only thing that's not bothering me.
It helps just enough for me to function during the day. And I didn't want to take anything else. 2017, I had an an interesting visit with my psychiatrist, where I had been going in there complaining month after month after month for, I don't know how many years about frustration and anger and rage and depression and anxiety, all these different things.
So he keeps, like I said, up in one night, taking on away, what am I replacing it? On this rollercoaster and this particular day, it was, it was an October, 2017. And I remember this very vividly cause like three different things happened all in a very short period of time. I had surgery and I saw him and I broke my ribs all in a matter of like a month.
But I went to see him. I was telling him about this like unexplainable rage that I was having. Like I was getting angry about the dishes and about, kids not picking up. Basic mom stuff, but I was getting super angry and I was frustrated because I hurt and I was tired and I kept having to do these things.
So all this was kind of cumulative and he said, well, it could be this one medication you're taking. And I don't mention that name when I talk about this, because I know it helps lots of people. Well, and I, just looked at him because I had been taking this medication for 15 years and I have been telling him the same things over and over again for like 15 years, I was like, I'm done.
I quit. And I never went back to see him. I guess I quit all my meds. I am not recommending anybody do this on their own. I spent the next month or two months tapering off because I'd been on and off so many different things. I knew how to take her off the medications. I knew what to look for. And that day.
I actually just realized this just recently, like I took my power back that day. I took the responsibility for my own wellbeing and my healing that day. And that was really the second part. I call it my healing journey because it was the second pivotal moment where I was like, nobody is going to be able to do this for me.
Nobody knows my body the way I know my body, the doctors are experts of medication, but they're not experts in my body. They're not feeling what I feel and all of these different things and decided that I was going to figure out a better way to do this. Or at least something better than what I had been dealing with.
Glee: Yeah. exactly. when you, have entered this Two-Minute Drill, I think it's, a contest in the states cause I'm here in Australia and not very familiar with it. cause this was one of the, big things that happened on your, business how it kickstarted more So
could you give us a bit of overview, how, it went.
Bonnie: So before, I posh notions is making t-shirts for businesses and organizations, mostly and working with David and mentoring with him and March, everything shuts down. So there's no need for what I was doing. But at that point I had a couple of different people come and ask me to make custom masks.
And I'm like, no, I don't know how to sew. I have no interest in sewing. And then the third person came and I was like, I believe in the law of three. I was like, I have to at least attempt this. And I was talking to David. I was like, you think this is something I could do. Do you think this would work?
And he was like, absolutely. So that was an April and a couple of weeks after that. And in a couple of weeks, I learned how to sew on a broken sewing machine and some vintage materials and some t-shirts and opened up my Etsy shop and did fairly well and was working with all of these vintage materials.
Cause at that time, getting supplies was near impossible and super expensive. So my mom was going to all of her friends that didn't sew anymore and was kind of bringing me boxes and boxes of materials, because they were selling elastic for like $4, which is normally like 10 cents.
So that's to give you just a frame of reference, it's like a, I dunno, like a 4000% markup for something like that, something crazy. So she's bringing me, I was, and I'm falling in love with all these vintage materials and I'm making all of these new things out of this old material, and I'm just loving the whole process of making skirts and pillows and all of these different things.
I'm learning once I learned how to sew I just wanted to make everything. So later in August, I was so in really late one night and all sudden popped into my head. Like, I wonder if I could build a business
Bonnie: And I scribbled down some notes and went into private coaching session with David again, a couple of days later.
And I was like, do you think this is something that I could do? And of course he gives up. Absolutely. Okay. So then, and it kind of just sat there the idea while it was still sewing and doing things, but I didn't really know how to take the next few steps in building this business that I wanted to build.
So I just kept writing down all of my ideas and kind of keeping track of them. While at the same time he was doing two minutes drill contests on, I think like YouTube or Instagram, Where the idea is is you have two minutes to pitch your business idea and they've got like four or five contestants or whatever, and the best pitch wins.
he's got his own criteria about, what the best pitch means. They decided to take it to global TV. So he starts talking about it. In our, private coaching sessions and on social media and whatnot. And I kind of hinting around and asking questions about it, but never really seriously thinking that I was going to do this because I didn't feel like I had any business doing something like that.
Like, I didn't feel like I belonged. I didn't feel like I had what I needed. Like I didn't have this huge business. I didn't have NFL backers and, you know, million dollar contracts and all these things that these people I'm listening to pitch had, but I was still interested by, by the whole thing. in late October, early November, we were in a private coach coaching session.
And he's telling everybody, like, if you haven't signed up to pitch to, compete you need to get your, your applications in. And that means you Bonnie. And like calls me in front of the whole group. And I'm like,
okay. I was like, I guess I have to do this. So I went ahead actually waited three more days, but then I went ahead and filled out the application.
It's funny because I was still thinking like, I'm just going to do this because I told them I was going to do it. Right. Like, I'm asking all these questions, I'm honest, at least fill out the application. I had no idea what to expect. And in the application it asks you for your target audience. And I'm like, I don't know.
I've been trying to figure this out for like six months. And all of a sudden it came to me and I typed it out. And then it asks you for like a mini pitch, like a short pitch, Again, I'm like, I don't know when all of a sudden it comes to me and it was like, it was like the universe delivered.
Like I finally, said, okay, I'm going to do this. It was like, the universe gave me exactly what I needed in that moment. And I submitted the application. I was like, all right, cool, I'm done. Let's go. I don't have to worry about this anymore. And I went to sleep and didn't think anymore about it. And a few days later I got an email saying that they accepted me and I'm running around my house screaming.
My husband's looking at me and said, what are you talking about? I'm texting my friends. And they're like, what are you talking about? Look, I'm going to be on TV. That's all you need to know. I will explain the rest later. And then I had to write a pitch and writing the pitch. It was super interesting. the only thing I was focused on at that point was not embarrassing myself and David and just doing the best I had.
Like I never, in a million years would have ever thought, like, I didn't think I belonged there, but alone. Was I going to win something like this? It was just do the best you can. So we don't embarrass anybody. And so right. My pitch and I'm practicing, I recorded myself like 400 times during this pitch to get the timing just right.
And the day comes and our power goes out and we have no power, like a half an hour before I'm supposed to log in. The power comes back on and we've still got no internet. And I'm like, alright, I don't know, universe do your thing. I was like, I'm going to get finished, getting ready, asked my son to keep an eye on my computer.
I was like, it's either going to happen. Or it's not like I did the best I could. And getting here about five minutes before I was supposed to log in the power camp or the internet and back on. And is it recording something like this for TV is a lot of standing around and I got to listen to everybody else's pitches and I'm like, well, that one was really good.
And that one was really good. And that was fabulous. I'm listening to all of the constructive criticism or feedback, and kind of make mental notes of these things. Like I said, these guys have this one guy had an NFL support, like people that work for the NFL backing his products, wearing his products and my turn
Bonnie: And I give my pitch and I'm like, again, I'm like, in my mind, I'm like, I'm done. Okay, cool. I just gotta stay in here and wait for them to tell me that, finish up and do the questions. And then, then I'm all done. And I listened to the last couple that went after me go and it dawned on me that I was the only person on the show that hadn't gotten any negative feedback or any like constructive criticism or anything like that.
And I was like, wait a minute. like, did I actually, no, there's no way I've pulled this off. So the producer comes on and he goes, Ken, everybody's giving their pitches. And whoever has will be the only one that pops up on the screen and everybody else stay tuned because we have questions. We want to ask you some standing there.
And it's like, all of a sudden I see my face pop up and I'm like, I'm try not to freak out and scream because my family's downstairs.
Glee: of the camera.
Bonnie: I'm like, and I was like, you keep saying, I was like, staring like this, trying not to. Freak out on yeah. On TV. And they come on and they, rehash the pitch and they congratulate me and I'm doing a standard is facing.
Thank you. And thank you. Like I'm trying not to cry. And but it was funny cause I had to wait up here for like another hour and a half after that, before I could go down and tell my family. So I'm just kind of standing here with them. Okay. Okay. Okay. Like trying to process what just happened because it's not fully sinking in and I go downstairs
finally and I tell it was crazy.
It was funny. I actually, at one point, cause my, my internet connection was so bad. My I don't know if you got to watch the show or not, but the video was so pixel. Yeah. Like you couldn't really see me through a lot of it. So they asked me to rerecord and every recorded like four more times and it wasn't working out.
They did end up using the pixelated video. So it's on it's on Amazon prime. It was on live on Bloomberg TV in January, but stuff on Amazon prime, if anybody wants to watch it, it was a seasoned one episode three. But it was so funny cause I went downstairs and my eight year old son is like my biggest cheerleader and I go out and I tell him and he's jumping up.
Then I saw excited. My husband was like, congrats. And And I go outside and I must have completely lost my mind. Cause I went on social media and made a video and like blabbed to everyone that I won. And I wasn't supposed to tell anyone because it didn't air for another six weeks or seven weeks or something.
I got a call from the team and they were like, you need to take that down. And I was like, okay. My mistake, I wasn't thinking straight. I was so excited and it's funny now, but I was done. Somebody likes terrified for three days that they were going to disqualify me. Right after going through all of that, I was like, see, I screwed it up.
I was like, I should've never did that. Like you know, that negative self-talk started creeping in, like, what were you thinking? You should have never done that. It all worked out. It was fine, but it's just funny how even without somebody saying something to you, sometimes our mind makes stuff up.
Right. To tell us that we're not good enough, we don't deserve this, that we don't, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, all these different things. So I know that's something that I've definitely struggled with. The majority of my life. And I've been working really hard the past, like probably like year, year and a half to kind of eradicate that.
I can, I can relate to that as well. I have a similar thing in very negative about myself and all that. It's, it's pretty hard to take it out. Like if you've been living with that mentality over the past, like the whole of your life, right. It's pretty needs like maybe strong will to be able to, slowly take out that negativity.
Bonnie: Yeah. You have to do a lot of replacing. for me, one of the techniques that I use is called negative habit loop triggers. So basically when you have a negative habit and it's on a loop, so you're telling yourself this stuff over and over again, I use that as a trigger.
So to kind of explain that, if you're constantly telling yourself, you know, I can't do this or this isn't gonna work out or whatever, those negative habits are the triggers for replacing with positive. So now what I try to do is when that starts, I use that as a, triggered it to switch to something positive.
Like I got this, like I was using an example. I was helping a woman with anxiety and I was explaining to her, she has kids, I've obviously have four kids. And I was telling her how, at one point it was really difficult to get my youngest two to go to bed. And it was just a constant struggle. And I would come up the steps multiple times and I go, I can't do this.
I just can't do this anymore. I can't do this. You know what I'm saying? This to myself, I can't do this anymore. And finally, I had to flip it to when I would start to say that was, I got this. It's going to be okay. They're going to lay down. Even if I didn't fully a hundred percent, believe it all the time.
It was still better than because saying I can't, I can't, I can't was this self-fulfilling prophecy where I would end up having a meltdown. I they'd be crying. I'd be yelling and like really wasn't handling the situation. Right. So replacing that at the very least kind of neutralized, then the negative self-talk that I was having.
And eventually I was able to completely replace that with it's going to be okay, I got this now it's not a hundred percent, it's not a hundred percent for anyone, but it's much better than feeding that constant negativity to yourself. I've actually been reading actually read a few books this past couple of weeks and somebody that's really good at mindset shifts is Gabby Bernstein.
I've read one of her books. And then I read Wayne Dyer book and I'm reading another one of her books all in the past two weeks after that, the fire that I told you about, I was really struggling with fear and having,
fearful negative thoughts. And I had already owned the book. I just hadn't read it yet.
And I was led to pick that book up. two days after we had the fire and I was like, wow, this is perfect timing. Because the title of the book is Universe Has Your Back Transforming Fear to Faith. And I'm like this couldn't be more perfect timing for me to find this book on my bookshelf.
it all has to do with mindset. And also what you're kind of what you're attracting into your life. Because if you're constantly feeding yourself negativity, you're going to be attracting negative stuff into your life. And if you can make that shift, it literally changes, changes your, whole life, your mind, your world, everything like that.
The shift that I've made from how sick I am to I'm healing. All of this just in a couple of years is phenomenal because unfortunately there's a lot of people that get the condition than I have, and it's completely crippled them.The same amount of time, you know, and it's different for everyone, but I'm just saying that I really feel like the mindset work that I've done and healing.
The inner me, not just the physical me has had it played a huge role in the fact that I'm not getting worse. that goes for anybody trying to accomplish anything, whether it's physical healing, building a business, landing, a job, you know, being successful inner voice if it's out of sync, if you're not feeling inspired, if you're not feeling in spirit and, and not religiously just connected to something other than yourself you're going to have a really hard time.
Making positive connections with being successful and all of those different things.
Glee: I love it. your story and what, you're sharing to us right now. It's very generous of you to share your story to us and inspire us because, as you've mentioned, what you experienced was such a roller coaster journey the, I couldn't even imagine it myself.
Like it's really hard and look at what you are now, what you've, you've come out of that. flood or something, you know, that drowned you. So, it's a very inspiring story and I'm very happy to share it with the listeners. And now I'm very curious and wanting to know what's next for posh notions.
What are your next plans?
Bonnie: It's funny. A lot of people ask me that when I first aired and I was doing a lot of interviews. And I found it very overwhelming at that point, because I was like, I wanted to have all these amazing things to tell people, right?
Like I'm doing this and I'm going to do this. And I I've planned for this. And I planned plans last because people are like, you just won this amazing prize and you were on TV. Like always amazing things must be happening for you now. And I did like a backslide, honestly. I was like, I don't know. It was like, I want to do this.
I want to do this. I want to do this. I wanted this. And the show most definitely opened up lots of different things for me. And I got to meet some amazing people and I'm so grateful for all of that, but it wasn't like I had an instant knowing that I was going to do XYZ. However, I still have plans to build this upcycling company.
I am building a a voucher program and to the company that's going to help give clothesto underprivileged kids a lot of kids get bullied because of their clothing, whether they come to school with holes in their clothes, or they're dirty, or they're too small or whatever the case is to fairly simple problem that as a community, we can help many, many, many kids without spending a ton of money.
And it's something that I think will help a lot with these kids. I was one of those kids. I struggled with that as a child being picked on constantly. Another part of that is helping people who don't necessarily want to start a business of cycling, but aren't happy with the other options out there.
I plan to hire people and have all of our up-cycling and product creation done. In-house so that these people who are creators can have a steady income, you know, salary benefits, all of those great things and get to do what they love. Because I really feel like when people are doing what they love, they do it much Nobody wants to sit a job that they hate all day. And not very many people want to do a great job at something that they don't really like to do. So those are two parts of it. the other huge part of it is the fact that we're going to be reducing the impact of the waste that's being thrown out on the environment by reusing materials we're going to be able to, drastically help and cut back on the amount of things that are thrown out.
The one big thing I'm working on right now is we took down, we had one of those easy set pools. So it was just literally a massive piece of vinyl that you fill up with water. And when part of it breaks or something happens, she throw this massive sheet of plastic that can't be recycled into the trash.
And I can't even imagine how many of them they're made to be disposable. Unfortunately. Yeah.
So I sh I cut ours up into sheets and I'm going to make tote bags out of it one way or another. I'm still trying to figure that out. I've been working with it here and there. However, right now I'm really working on myself.
I'm investing in myself, I'm learning as much as I can. We're on summer break here. And so all of my kids are home. Actually. My my only daughter is off at college right now. But I am spending as much time doing what I call adapt and overlap, which is constantly adapting to what's kind of going on with my family, but also overlapping activities. So there are certain things I can do outside that I work on with the t-shirts and whatnot stuff is opening back up.
So I plan to be making more. And working with other organizations to make their branded apparel. but the biggest thing is not stressing about what's next. It's the biggest thing I'm
doing right now, as I had to learn, that was a huge four months of learning to stop stressing and stop trying to constantly intellectually figure out what that is, because once I kind of let go and surrendered, like all 2020, it was a year of surrender for me when I surrendered and let go, all of these amazing things just started coming.
I was still working on things, but I wasn't stressing about how it was going to figure everything out. It was like, I want to do this. And you know, think of a couple of different ways that I would like to do. But it never ended up working out exactly how I planned. It was something, somebody would say something or I would see something somewhere else in the answers.
Like I said, even with the pitch, we're just kind of delivered to me. I know a lot of people don't believe in this quote unquote woo stuff, but I'm telling you it works. it's been amazing. And I'm saying again, from reading these books to kind of fine tune this, but for example, right before summer started, I had been asked that same question and I was kind of stressing about it.
And I was like, I talked to a mentor of mine and I was like, look, this is what I'm stressing out. And the stress was what was blocking me from figuring out what it was that I wanted to do next, because I was just stressing about it so much. And as soon as I stopped stressing about, I briefly mentioned the unbreakable campaign was something I was working on after meeting
Bonnie: I had an interview a couple of weeks ago. And someone in Evan's ecosystem did the interview and he came to me a few days later and he was like, I want to talk to you about your unbreakable campaign. Now I've had this thing on hold for almost two years because I couldn't manage it all by myself.
And I kept saying, when I'm ready, I'll bring it back. and I'm going to work on it and I'm going to have a partner. And this is it's going to work out. The man was literally delivered to me. He does all of the stuff that I don't like to do. All of the technical stuff, all of the backend stuff, all the website stuff, all of these things that were whole email campaigns.
It was holding me up from being able to deliver value to people and to help people, because I was so caught up in those details at that point in time, and now it's happening and we're getting ready. We a rebrand and we're getting to do a relaunch. Like everything that I've wanted to do with this is, is now happening all because I let go of thenotion of
just the stress and that I had to do everything by myself.
But I can't stress enough how important it is to A) take care of yourself. B) to reduce stress as much as possible, see, to have fun with what you're doing.
I know some people are going to be rolling their eyes, hearing me say that I rolled my eyes a hundred times I heard it too. Cause I'm like, how am I possibly supposed to make this fun? But you've got it. Find something. If it's not your job, find something fun every day, something little, even if it's only two minutes, something you enjoy something that gives you satisfaction, something that makes you feel good because that's really the most important part.
Glee: Thank you. Bonnie was, I know that as you mentioned, they are simple steps, but it's really, it's hard to do right. As well, if, especially, and that's why we need people maybe mentors or our friends or people like you, who will inspire us to, and remind us to do these things.
Because if we don't get reminded, sometimes we forget
Bonnie: Yeah. I forget. Which is why I think I led got led back to these books because I was allowing myself to get stressed out by something that I'm not gonna say it's not important, but it was, stressing out because people were in shock. Like people were, yes, people were interested in what I was going to do and I couldn't figure it out.
And I was letting that stress me out. And really all stress is as your perception or perspective about something, that's happened because a lot of other people would have been super excited to have so many ask them what's next. And maybe they had it all figured out and that wouldn't be stressful for them at all.
But my perception of it at that point, and for a few months was when people were asking me if that means I'm supposed to have it all figured out, that must mean that I'm supposed to have it all figured out. Why don't I have this all figured out? What am I supposed to be doing? I don't know. You know, and it was this huge snowball effect of one person's comment or two people's comments made me feel like I was less than worthy.
Right. I wasn't enough. I wasn't doing enough. I wasn't thinking enough. I didn't have things planned enough. Just it was all this judgment that wasn't even there. Like I was making this up in my head,
which again, that's where the unnecessary stress comes from is nobody said any of that to me. That's that was how I perceived their questions.
You know what I mean?
Glee: Ah, yeah. Yeah. I get what you mean? and thank you for your authenticity on, saying that because if I would have been on your shoes, it would be like, I have to think what's next so that I can say, you know, something but telling it right now to us, that you don't have things figured out yet, not everything is laid out yet, not on your head.
So, it's a huge reminder that to everyone that even if you had this big thing going on, it's not that you're a hundred percent knowing what's the next step. What's the next plan. Right? So it was, it was great. Thank you for that.
Bonnie: You're welcome. In another point to that was now talking with you about it. Part of the reason I didn't have things figured out is of, I never expected to win like that. Wasn't part of my plan. So it was like, here you go. Here's all these amazing gifts and these, all these amazing services.
And I'm like, I don't know what to do with any of this stuff that, that wasn't, you know, I didn't have that plan. And I'm so grateful for everything the way that it unraveled, because I got to learn so much. But like I said, I didn't I just planned to show up. I hadn't, I didn't plan to come away winning.
like I said, I'm grateful. I'm not at all. Like, man, that shouldn't happen or anything, but it could've been in my game plan. Cause that's not how I was thinking. And that's another good point too, showing up and having positive intentions and a lot of times universe delivers you way more than you could have ever expected.
Especially when it's not going according to your plan, because that definitely
wasn't mine, you know?
Glee: the universe have bigger plans, well, if we show up right.
Bonnie: absolutely, I'm learning that over and over and over again, but it all comes down to surrendering and, being positive and surrender doesn't necessarily mean what a lot of people think. I think it means surrendering just means to believing, putting your ego aside.
And this is another thing I struggle with is I'm always worried about trusting and how strong I'm going to be, how strong my body's going to be. Am I going to be able to keep up? And that's what this last, the fire and reading these books has taught me, is it's not myself that I need to trust and it's in the universe and the bigger plans that the universe or God, or whoever, whatever you want to call it has for you is going to work.
If you surrender kind of your ego to that. So I just wanted to explain
surrender didn't make any sense to me,
Glee: Yeah. Lovely. Thank you. Thank you so much. Bonnie it's so refreshing, to hear about someone saying surrender and not in the surrender terms that we know usually is that I get it. So yeah. Before we wrap things up, I wanted to ask you some few questions, not kind of related to this to the topic more of, on, about you. What are the top five songs on your playlist that you can't live without?
Bonnie: wow. So Because I'm really bad at remembering names, actually. Okay. I'm working
on getting better at yes. I'm working at getting better. I'm not going to say I'm bad. I'm working at getting better at remembering names of things. So I'm going to cheat because I have my phone sitting right here.
Cause I know what songs they are and I don't remember the names of them. well, I like all kinds of genres, but I liked those songs or when you turn them on, you can't help but move. And I don't necessarily mean
like you have to dance, but like I feel low energy, physical energy. So often that if I can turn something on like that, it like instantly makes me want to get up and move and do stuff and get motivated.
So I'm going to look through here.
Glee: Sorry for putting you on the spot right
Bonnie: One is one is Firestarter. I remember that one. by the prodigy right here right now by Fatboy slim was another one. I like super bloom. I don't know if you've heard that song by Mr.
Wives. It's a really uplifting song in my opinion. Watermelon sugar is another one that for some reason, it's newer by Harry styles and then my all time favorite song and not because it gets me motivated, but it's, the story behind it is by the band from way back in the day called Candlebox and I'm going to, oh, the name of the song is far behind.
That's I think my all time favorite song. But the story behind the song and the song itself is really touching.
Glee: And so if you have, let's say there's no, COVID right now. if you have to jump on a plane and go to a place, which place would that be?
Bonnie: It's funny. Cause I always used to say Australia, I always wanted to go to like Australia, New Zealand, which is where you are. Yeah. I think though right now I would end up in California, which sounds funny, but everybody that whose energy that I want to be around. It's pretty much in California or easily accessible from California at this point.
Um, so I think that's where I would go is because of the people.
Glee: great. Thank you for that little game that we had. So where can our Zesties find you and Posh notions?
Bonnie: so I am literally Posh notions across social media. So Instagram,
Facebook, Twitter everywhere and PoshNotions.com and I'm also on Etsy at posh notions. And right now, we are re launching it's now called unbreakable stories. So we're just getting started with the social media and Unbreakable stories is to have people sharing their stories, to help uplift and empower other people going through the same things. So it's kind of to help give them a roadmap and support, especially in the early days after being diagnosed with something like what I have chronic illness, or after going through a trauma we're building basically an on a huge online support system.
So UnbreakableStories.Com I believe is the website. If anybody's interested in checking it out, it's literally, we haven't even announced, announced it yet. So it's just in the very beginning. But it's a really great project and it has our hearts behind it. And it's something that I've been waiting to bring to life fully for the past two and a half years now.
So I'm super excited to be getting that off the ground with my partner, Terry.
Glee: We're looking forward to that one,Bonnie, as well as the next products we're off partial notions. So thank you so much again for your time and for your generosity and authenticity in this, episodes that I'm having here at Gleeful talk show. So thank you.
Bonnie: thank you so much.
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